Tourists will enjoy Tom’s Kitchen with its elegant décor and views down a terrace to the Thames. And the food, on the whole, is good. But it won’t blow you away – which is not what he wants. He wants you to stay.

I really wanted to like Redhook but there’s a balance between making customers feel like part of the crew and casting them out on such a long line that they feel lost and forgotten, bobbing around in a sea of other thirsty and hungry people. Put some welly into front of house and Redhook could be reeling them in.

You can tell a lot about a person from their sense of humour, and while, naturally, I take great pleasure in witty wordsmithery and brilliant badinage, my funny bone belongs to sauce. So when I saw that the new Bavarian Beerhouse is located in Crutched Friars, I confess that I allowed myself a small, but heart-felt ‘oo-er’.

I rang the restaurant upstairs and said ‘Hello I’m eating oysters downstairs and its freezing and making me sad. Can I come and have lunch in your nice warm restaurant please?’ And the man said ‘Yes but you have to order in the next six minutes because the kitchen closes at 2.30.’

Tempo, with its barley-coloured walls and splendid turquoise upholstered chairs could seem formal when empty. But as a Regency drawing room in a listed building, its cornices, fittings and curves substituted any lack of warmth. Perhaps the waffle ceiling and square arch could be more sympathetic but they also showed boldness- like the food.

Why anyone would want to traipse out to East London to eat pompous self-indulgent food when Robuchon is in town is beyond me. At L’Atelier the balance of creativity with common sense and clear cooking skills is perfect, the room delightful and the staff, even when wielding fire extinguishers, cool and solicitous.

Inside Dishoom it’s as false as any other themed place in London. Packed with patina that you pay for and then install in great swathes. So what though? The pictures are actually rather interesting, the interior clean and bright and I am not eating the décor, even if some critics appear to be chewing the carpet.

Whilst we were eating we saw several people queuing for tables, given that this was a Wednesday evening, this is a popular restaurant indeed. I imagine this is for two reasons, the food is very good and it is very reasonably priced.

Scharff, who wears a chef’s jacket embroidered with as many logos of professional bodies as a racing car driver sports adverts, is patron of ‘Wartenberger Mühle’, Pfaltz, a restaurant, brasserie, boutique hotel and substantial, sweet smelling, stepped herb garden…

How many restaurants can lay claim to a Banksy on their wall? The answer is probably not many. But Namo, a modern Vietnamese restaurant in the heart of leafy Victoria Park, can boast one. Well, almost one as it’s been partially painted over and graffitied on since it’s inception.